Ed Rampell: Cruzmissile, the Canadian-born son of a Cuban émigré (and professional Senator Joe McCarthy sound- and lookalike) who has made a political career out of bashing his fellow Latinos, is stunned and scratching his noggin, now that he’s been out-birthered by ’Murican-born Rumpolini.
Charles Orloski: Having undergone Matt Dillon and Cartwright family socialization, and given that birthday #64 had several hours left, I thought it best to forget how I once proudly wore a studded Roy Rogers shirt and cowboy hat.
Ed Rampell: In her vulgarity-laced endorsement speech, the Godzilla from Wasilla cackled that the billionaire was not “an elitist.”
Treva Brandon Scharf: Most online dating exchanges are warm and fuzzy, fun and flirty—especially in the beginning. However, this get-to-know-you email was hardly that. It was a tongue lashing.
Ed Rampell: Now that Beckel has lost his posh perch on Fox as a punching gasbag for rightwing halfwits, he is exploiting his addiction to illegal drugs and booze with a new memoir (“co-written” by a “co-author,” BTW) about his painkiller and cocaine abuse and alcoholism.